The Stockholm Oreo

(With apologies to Smokey Robinson.)

People say I should run for President,
Become the outreach C.E.O.
I'd cut the Dem vote and be Resident,
Not just the neocons' best 'ho.
So watch me act like my heart can bleed;
Hear me crack over deaths that I read;
And just like Reagan I can cry at need
My crocodile tears.

I want votes, all votes,
So as I speak if I should reek of much compassion,
Full of victim empathy,
Although it makes you sick,
Recall it's just a trick --
The right has my sympathy.
So watch me act like my heart can bleed;
Hear me crack over deaths that I read;
And just like Reagan I can cry at need
My crocodile tears.

I need votes, more votes,
So with George's term ending
I will practice pretending
That I care and trust
And their pain I share.
I do so welcome them
Until I can bomb them to dust.
So watch me act like my heart can bleed;
Hear me crack over deaths that I read;
And just like Reagan I can cry at need
My crocodile tears.