Sunday, December 18, 2005

I'll Be At War For Xmas



We were told by skippy:
yes, virginia, there is a war on christmas.

it exists as certainly as lesbian feminazi’s who want to abort all the babies in the world exist, it exists as certainly as communist jewish pinkos who want to force children to worship satan in the schools exist. alas! how dreary would the world be if there were no war on christmas!
We were even warned about the leader of their shock troops by Fafblog:
You see Santa lives in the North Pole where he crashed to earth thousands a years ago in the time before time, when the Jolly Ones walked the earth and stalked primitive man in the halls of the Jingle King. Now he sleeps beneath the frozen wastes waiting for the one time a year when the stars are right and he can rise from the ice to spread toys an goodies an Christmas cheer an feast on the brains of naughty children everywhere.
Now the evil Santerrorists have come out in the open on the streets of a place just hours ahead of us:
A gang of drunken "Santas" caused merry hell across central Auckland yesterday, robbing stores, tagging buildings and assaulting security guards.

Three men were arrested on a variety of drunk and disorderly charges, and two security guards had to be treated for cuts after being hit with beer bottles.

The group of 40 men - mostly in their mid-20s and dressed in ill-fitting Santa costumes - began their "Santarchy" shortly after 2pm. First stop was the Victoria St motorway overbridge where they smashed beer bottles and urinated.

They moved through Victoria Park kicking over rubbish bins, throwing bottles at cars and leaping in front of vehicles. One also tagged the Victoria St NZ Post building. Then they headed to the Sky City Casino where several vandalised the giant Christmas tree in the foyer.

Some made their way to the Victoria St Star Mart where they took several items from the shelves. Then it was through Queen St, High St and down to Britomart where security guards said they were yelling, swearing and "causing mayhem".

One ripped a window wiper off a bus while others harangued security guards and waiting passengers. --New Zealand Herald
This Axis of Grinchiness even has it's own anti-Christmas song, viciously using the music of my favorite carol reset to words from H. P. Lovecraft fans! You can read the lyrics, and click on a link that will play the song for you at The Carol of the Old Ones:
Eons have passed: now then at last
Prison walls break, Old Ones awake!
They will return: mankind will learn
New kinds of fear when they are here.
Turn off the lights on your tree, and be very afraid. (Thanks to BlondeSense for the picture.)

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